Summer can be challenging for people with body image and eating problems. The more revealing clothing of summer can bring with it feelings of intense pressure to look good and worry about body image, which can detract from social activities. These pressures are reinforced and sometimes promoted by social and traditional media.
Vacations and long weekends, while they can be terrific, may exacerbate concerns about navigating unfamiliar foods and avoiding overeating in restaurants, barbecues, or at friends’ homes. They can also increase uneasiness about one’s appearance in shorts, capris, or bathing suits.
To try to control weight, we may try to restrict food intake, which can set up a perpetual cycle of binging and self-loathing. Some might also purge, overexercise, or starve themselves to try to compensate. These behaviors, as well as obsessively checking our body, are emotionally and physically draining and usually lead to feelings of decreased self-worth. The more we focus on trying to have the perfect figure, the more likely we are to hold back from fun and isolate ourselves. Of course, isolation adds to loneliness and can compel us to eat unhealthy foods to attempt to assuage the negative feelings—and so, the cycle continues.
For folks who already have a tendency toward food obsession and judging our bodies unfavorably, the pressure to look good can lead to a sense of hopelessness. When discouraged we might even ask, “Why bother trying to control my eating and weight when I know I will never look good enough?”
However, there are better, more empowering, questions:
Should I Eat That Food or Not? Three Questions to Help You Decide When Conflicted
When a specific food is calling—whether you are in a social setting or alone—here are some questions that will help you make more helpful self-affirming choices:
- Am I really physically hungry?
- Often what we think is physical hunger, is really just “mouth hunger.” While there are multitude of possible reasons for “mouth hunger” (stress, sadness, comfort-seeking), the common denominator is that we erroneously equate the desire to eat with real “stomach” hunger.
- If I eat that food now, will I feel good about it tomorrow?
- If I start eating that food, will I be able to stop when I’m full (walk away from the table feeling light, not stuffed)?
If the answer to these questions is “yes,” you can feel comfortable to enjoy these foods without guilt.
In circumstances in which you are truly hungry, but the food you are eyeing is one that you have difficulty stopping, think of a different food (one that you like, but are more likely to be able to eat in moderation), which would allow you to walk away from the table feeling satisfied without being stuffed.
If you recognize that you have “mouth hunger” instead of “stomach hunger,” if the food will likely make you feel bad, or if it will be hard to eat moderately, ask yourself another question: “What need am I looking for the food to satisfy and how can I address that need without eating something that I will regret later?”
Perhaps, you are at a pool party and realize that you have “mouth hunger” because you are judging your appearance or are pressuring yourself to talk to people who make you uncomfortable. Maybe this is the time to remind yourself that you don’t have to be perfect—in appearance or social behavior. Instead, try dipping your feet in the water or confiding in the friend you came with that you are feeling awkward.
If you realize the “hunger” is because you are working late at the office, pressuring yourself to finish yet one more high-profile project, it might be better to pause. Take a breath and ask yourself, what non-food activity might you build into your schedule later in the week, which you would feel good about? Maybe this is the time to plan to play golf, tennis, or pickleball. If you are feeling creative, order theatre tickets, pick up a paintbrush, or schedule a guitar or piano lesson.
While summer certainly has its challenges, the longer days also present the opportunity for joy. They also afford us more time to get help and work on these issues.